


Never Missed Chrismas, Til I Met You

by darktensh17



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Brendol Hux's A+ Parenting, Christmas, Loss of Parent(s), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 09:38:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16808074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darktensh17/pseuds/darktensh17
Summary: Five times Armitage Hux has not celebrated the Christmas Holidays and one time he did.





	Never Missed Chrismas, Til I Met You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [miss_Splendora](https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_Splendora/gifts).



> Happy Secret Santa! I hope that this fic fills you with joy and not too many tears (I had some tears writing it) and that you have a very happy holiday miss_Splendora!

For the entirety Armie's life it's just been him and Mama in their little apartment above an Irish restaurant. Mama works in the restaurant kitchens, making really yummy food for all the people that come in. Sometimes she brings some home, or makes Armie special recipes from her home. On those days that Mama has to work late at night, the owner of the restaurant, Miss Rae, lets Armie sit and do his homework and colour inside the the restaurant. There's a little corner that has a table reserved just for Armie and he loves it, it makes him feel important. Even when sometimes the old ladies who come in make weird noises at him and try to pinch his cheeks.

The kids in class tease him sometimes, making fun of the fact that he doesn't have a papa, or two mamas or two papas, like the other kids do. His mama is the best and he doesn't have to share her with anyone when it's the two of them. When Mama’s not at work, they cuddle up in Mama's bed when it’s time to sleep, or when Armie isn’t feeling good.. Mama is the best cuddler. They always read a book together before bed and then Mama sings him a song from her home in Ireland until he falls asleep.

Every night she presses a kiss to his forehead and cheeks, "Remember that Mama always loves you, my little star."

Armie doesn't have a lot of toys like other kids in his class do, but that doesn't really bother him. He doesn't need a lot, especially when he likes reading most of the time and he can get as many books as he wants from the library. At Christmas Mama always gets him at least one gift, one thing he really wants and it makes him so happy. Armie makes sure to make Mama the best present he can, something that always makes her smile. This year Miss Rae has been teaching him to knit. He's only little so he's having troubles but he's going to make Mama a scarf. She's been cold and shivering a lot lately, it’s the perfect gift!

Two weeks before Christmas Mama gets sick, very sick, and she has to go to the hospital. Armie has to stay with Miss Rae and only gets to visit Mama at certain times and he hates it. He wants to be with her all the time. He uses the time he’s away from her to finish the scarf. It's got Mama's favourite colours; red, green, and gold. Any time he's not at school, doing homework, visiting Mama or sleeping he works on the scarf.

He's so proud when he finishes it. It's three days before Christmas and he’s ready to give to it to Mama!

Only. . . the day before Christmas Mama goes to sleep and she won't wake up. The nurse explains that she's gone somewhere else, that she'll be waiting for him there when he's ready to go with her. Armie doesn't understand at all. Why can't she be here? Why can't he go to her now?

He has to stay with Miss Rae for a few days, and she tells him what happens when people die. That Mama was very sick and her body wasn't able to keep going. She gives him the present Mama got him, and he opens it crying when he sees the book with all the pictures with him and Mama.

They hold Mama's funeral the day after Christmas so that people can still celebrate the holiday. For Armie there is no Christmas, not without Mama.

-

Armie learns quickly that his father is not a kind or patient man. He agrees to take custody of him months after Mama's death. During that time Armie had stayed with Miss Rae, who has always been kind but distant. She seemed to miss Mama almost as much as Armie did.

The first day Armie meets his father, the man scares him. He doesn’t want to go with this mean looking man, he wants to stay with Miss Rae.

"Enough of that. You're a Hux, no matter how illegitimate you are and you will stop sniveling and come with me." His father grabs Armie's bags and brings them to his car, throwing them in and returning to grab Armie's hand and drag him to the vehicle and shoving him into the back seat.

Despite the man’s words, Armie cries as he watches the only home he's ever known get smaller and smaller as they drive away from it.

"Stop that racket! Huxs do not cry or act in such disgrace. Your mother was obviously too soft on you. I never should have let her keep you, then I wouldn't be in this mess." His father's voice is angry, and it scares Armie, who curls up in the seat, sniffling and trying to stop his tears. He doesn't want to be yelled at anymore.

They drive for hours without stopping until they get to a big house in a strange city. Father ushers him out of the car and inside where there's a tall woman waiting. She glares at Father and then at Armie.

"So this is the little bastard then. Not much to look at."

Father grunts and pushes Armie forward a little. "This is my wife Maratelle, your step-mother."

Maratelle scoffs at this. "I think not. You will call me Ma'am boy, and nothing else. Is that understood?"

"Y-yes Ma'am."

Satisfied she leaves and Father shows Armie to his new room. It's bigger than his last one and there isn't anything on the walls, not eve any toys in the room. At least the bookshelves have lots of books in them. "This will be your room. You will remain here unless otherwise called. I will not have you running around making noise. When I am having business dinners, you will attend and be on your best behavior. I don't know what bad habits your mother may have instilled in you but we will undo all of them and make you into at least a child who is seen and not heard. Am I understood?"

“Yes, Father.” 

The following year is the worst year of Armie's life. Father is cruel and cold to him, he says mean things and is always correcting how Armie does things. On the other hand Maratelle pretends he doesn't exist, she only speaks to him if she has to. Armie spends most of his time in his room, reading and staring at the photo album his mother made him. If he cries, he keeps it quiet so that no one hears him.

When Christmas time comes around, Armie doesn't feel the joy that he once did, instead he stay in his room, curled up with the scarf that he'd knit for his mother while Father and Maratelle host dinners where people talk and laugh. He doesn't care that he's missing Christmas. He just wants his Mama back.

-

Armitage is ten and he is the perfect child, or so all of Brendol's associates and their wives are always telling his father. He keeps to himself, he's obedient, polite, and his grades are always perfect. 

This past fall they have moved to a larger city and he has been switched into an elite private school. It makes no difference to him where they live or he goes to school. He never had friends at his old school anyway.

Brendol tells him to make acquaintances; not friendships so much as possible future business associates. "Your peers in this school may be your future employees, business partners or co-workers. It is time to start cultivating bonds these bonds with other children now while they're young and impressionable, it will be useful when you're older." The 'don't fail me' is implied. It doesn't need to be said; Armitage has heard it enough over the last five years to obey it without ti being spoken aloud.

"Yes, Father."

It's in this school that he meets Phasma Chrome. She's ruthless, bordering on cruel, and takes no shit. Armitage takes to her immediately and she to him. They ridicule the other students and soon stand out as the unofficial leaders of their grade. Nothing goes on without them knowing.

"Knowledge is power." Brendol says in approval, the first time there's a call from the school expressing concern with the behaviour. There's no disciplinary measures because what Armitage and Phasma are doing aren't against the school's rules. It's one of the few times that Brendol has shown Armitage any sort of pride.

The school usually puts on some sort of Christmas event, but Armitage and Phasma veto it for their class. Armitage doesn’t celebrate the Christmas and Phasma hates all holidays. They face the wrath of their classmates, but in the end the class relents. It begins a tradition for the grades that they're in all through elementary and high school.

If his fellow students hate him for it, it never bothers Armitage. They are all beneath him and Christmas is a holiday that exists to allow companies to increase their annual sales. A brilliant move, but it has no real meaning. The Hux family has not celebrated Christmas for as long as Armitage has lived with his Father and he is better for it.

He spends the majority of the holidays in his room getting ahead on assignments. It's the first year he doesn't look at the photo album.

-

"Hey, there gorgeous." Long arms wrap around Hux's middle and pull him close while a cold nose buries itself at the nape of his neck. "Mmm you smell good."

Hux squawks in indignation at the sudden cold. "Kylo you brute! Unhand me at once!"

Kylo hums and pulls Hux tighter against him. "Can't do that, you're my personal heater right now. It's cold outside."

"Of course it's cold outside! We're right on the verge of winter officially being started. The term ends in three days." Hux gives up trying to pull away from his boyfriend, the man's got a grip like a vice. Something that Hux rarely has issues with unless he's being stubborn.

Hux and Kylo met during Hux's second year of college and Kylo's first year. Despite his father's wishes Hux had not pursued a law degree, instead he'd gone into engineering. He'd met Kylo in his drafting class, the other man pursuing a dual degree in architecture and interior design.

They had not gotten along well at first; Kylo had knocked over Hux's things on the first day without apologizing and it had rubbed Hux the wrong way. It didn't help that they'd been forced to sit beside each other in the class, nearer to the back due to their heights.

They'd spent most of the term trying to outdo each other and annoy each other. It would have gone on loner if Phasma hadn't intervened, read gotten them drunk enough, to reveal the attraction they had for each other. Of course nothing came of that until they'd been forced to work on a project together and realized they had a lot in common and worked well together. They've been dating since March and it's now December.

Kylo is quiet, before he speaks up again. "So, I have some bad news. My parents are forcing me to go to my Uncle's in Florida for the holidays. I told them I had other plans but they won't budge. My cousin's going to be turning eighteen on New Years and they're making a big deal of it. Not that they cared that much about when I turned eighteen." Kylo sighs and hugs Hux tighter. "I'm sorry about this, I really wanted to spend Christmas here with you."

Hux hasn't told Kylo yet that he doesn't celebrate Christmas in any capacity, if he had maybe Kylo wouldn’t be so worried.. He hasn't had the heart to though, not when Kylo had been so excited and planning all sorts of activities for them to do together. It doesn't matter that Hux has almost starting to look forward to it, he's used to this time of the year meaning nothing, or bringing heartbreak and disappointment. 

"That's alright." Hux turns in his arms so that he can wrap his arms around Kylo's neck and give him a peck on the lips. "Just make sure you have fun in Florida, and enjoy the heat, because the weather is likely to be beyond frigid when you return. We can exchange gifts when you get back."

For the first time since he was five, Hux has taken up knitting needles again and has been trying to re-learn to knit so that he can make Kylo a hat, gloves and matching scarf for a gift. He's trying to make them resemble Kylo's favourite Star Wars character Darth Vader. It's going slowly, especially with end of term deadlines and the fact that he’s restarted three times. Kylo being gone will give him a chance to hopefully finish the gift. 

This is the first gift he's given anyone since he was a small child and he wants it to be perfect. It doesn't matter that he won't be able to give it to Kylo on Christmas day.

"I'll just have to make sure to cuddle you extra before I leave and once I get back. You always keep me warm." Kylo purrs as he runs his still freezing hands up the back of Hux's sweater.

"Kylo!"

-

Hux is curled up in the apartment he shares with Kylo when his cellphone starts blaring the Imperial March, Kylo's personal ringtone that he, of course, chose for himself. "Hello."

"Hey babe," Kylo's voice cracks a little as he talks, causing Hux to sit up quickly, setting the book he was reading aside.

"Kylo? What's wrong?"

Kylo sighs on the other end, the sound mournful. "Dad took a turn for the worst last night, they're not sure that he's gunna make it. I'm going to stay here for a few weeks longer. I've already emailed my professors and they've agreed to let me do my exams at the college here and I can mail my physical assignments to them."

Two weeks ago Kylo's father Han had been involved in an accident; a drunk driver hit him as he was driving home and he'd been in a coma ever since. Kylo had flown down to where his parents lived to be with his family. Hux had stayed behind, not knowing Kylo's family well enough and at Kylo's insistence because of all the assignments he had due, it was his last year of school and he needed to pass all his classes if he wished to be able to do his school work placement in during his last semester.

"Love, it's important for you to be with your family right now. Don't worry about me. I miss you but I'll be fine. Do you want me to fly out once the semester is over?" Hux couldn't help but jiggle his right leg, a nervous habit that occasionally flared up when he was feeling particularly anxious.

"It's probably better if you don't. As much as I'd love you here the weather is awful this time of year and it'd cost you too much. Just, call me often? And I'll keep you updated about what's going on here."

As much as Hux wanted to be there with Kylo, it was sound reasoning. Besides, he was used to spending the holidays alone. Having actually celebrated Christmas with Kylo last year wouldn't change a thing. "That sounds good. I love you."

"I love you too babe. Happy Holidays.

"Happy Holidays Kylo."

It’s not so bad spending the holiday alone, and Christmas day Kylo calls to tell him that Han had come out of his come on his own the night before. Unbidden Hux thinks of his mother, and he wonders if maybe there is such a thing as a Christmas miracle. 

-

"Alright, close your eyes and keep them closed."

Armitage fights back a chuckle and does as he's told. "They're closed Ben, and even if they weren't, by back is turned from you."

Ben doesn't say anything, but armitage can hear him rummaging around in the spare room of their house.The one they'd bought together a year after Ben had graduated college. It's a small two bedroom on the outskirts of the city they both work in, but it serves them well. Armitage had been enamored by the garden in front due to his new love of cooking. He'd recently received a gift from Miss Rae who used to own the restaurant his mother had worked at; it was a book of his mother's recipes and was learning to make them all.

It's Christmas morning now, the first one in their new house, and Armitage is waiting for Ben to bring out his present. Armitage has already given Ben the drawing table and new set of drafting tools that he'd gotten him, Ben had loved them. It was a practical gift, but Armitage had put a lot of research and thought into which ones to get.

"Move your hands a bit."

Armitage does as Ben says and moves his hands out of his lap, he startles when something small and moving is placed into it. He doesn't even wait for Ben to tell him to open his eyes, they're already flying open as he stares down at the tiny, fluffy ginger kitten currently exploring his lap.

"Oh Ben, she's beautiful." He scratches her ears and smiles when she turns to look up at him with big green eyes,with a curious mew. 

Laughing Ben, kneels in front of him. "I knew she was the one when I saw that she matched you. Her name's Millicent, but you can change it if you want to."

"No, I love it. Hello Millie." He lifts her up to rub noses with her, only to notice something hanging from the little bow red bow around her neck. At first he things that it's a name tag, but then a green stone catches light and Armitage's eyes fly-up to look at Ben, who is still kneeling in front of him. "Ben?"

With great care, Ben undoes the ribbon around Millie's neck and the black Claddagh ring falls into his open palm. It's got a heart shaped green emerald clasped between the hands of the band.

Holding the ring up in hands that are shaking slightly, Ben takes Armitage’s left hand in his own. "Armitage Hux, light of my life, love of my heart. will you marry me?"

Armitage stares at the ring, trying to fight back tears as he stares at the ring. He almost forgets he's supposed to say anything, but Millie squirming in his lap jolts him. He sets her on the couch and throws himself into Ben's arms. "Yes! Of course I will! I can’t believe you got me a cat and proposed to me on the same day.”

Laughing in reply Ben kisses him deeply. “I had to make sure it this year marked the first year of many good Christmases to come. I just don’t know how I’m going to top it next year.” 

Armitage doesn’t think Ben will ever be able to top this, but that’s alright because it’s the best Christmas he’s had since he was a small child.


End file.
